Dear Kid Whisperer,

I've heard you say in trainings that you should notice kids once every 90 seconds, and I do that. My question is: How much noticing is too much noticing? Does noticing kids this often train them to need constant noticing in order to continue using positive behaviors? Does it become less effective over time? Can kids become "desensitized" to noticing?

Answer: The quick answer is that you cannot use Strategic Noticing too much. It does not train kids to “need” to be noticed to continue using positive behaviors. And it becomes more effective over time, not less, so the same amount of noticing gets even more positive behaviors over time.

Strategic Noticing is a revolutionary means of systematically reinforcing positive behaviors that gives attention to positive behaviors in the most easy and effective way possible. It is not praise, it is not “liking” (“I like how Johnny is seated.”), and it is not thanking kids (“Thank you for being seated.”). Unless someone has had Behavioral Leadership training or read "The Classroom Behavior Manual," they do not use this, or at least they do not use this with full efficacy.

Without Behavioral Leadership instruction, educators, through absolutely no fault of their own, will be using the Deficit Model of Behavior Management. As kids, we were all taught with this model, so we are comfortable with it: When everything is going well, the teacher teaches (because who knows when it will go well again?!?!). Then, at some point, kids will exhibit any of three deficits:

They don’t know something that was taught.

They don’t work hard.

They use a negative behavior (a behavior that causes a problem).

When we give attention and thereby control to these behaviors, we are systematically reinforcing all of the negative behaviors that we don’t want kids to use.

Let that sink in for a moment.

This Deficit Model of Behavior Management, while it feels comfortable, doesn’t work. It encourages kids to not know things (or pretend that they don’t), to not work, and to cause problems.

What would the effect on schools, communities and our country be if every classroom in this country was making kids at least slightly worse, every day?

I would say that you can likely see the effects of this by walking anywhere outside of your house where there are kids present.

I hope that you are properly horrified so that you might be willing to consider an alternative.

The alternative is the Strengths Model of Behavioral Leadership. It is not the way any of us were taught. For this reason, if you have the strength to try it out, it will feel uncomfortable. If you work with middle or high school students, it will feel very uncomfortable.

The Strengths Model of Behavioral Leadership goes like this: When everything is going well, we constantly and systematically reinforce the behaviors that we do want to see. These are the behaviors that will make kids happy, healthy and successful in life, and the behaviors that will make them and their classrooms better and more functional right now. They are the behaviors that kids use to show their strengths. When kids demonstrate:

That they do understand something that was taught.

That they are working hard.

That they are not causing problems for other people, or are perhaps even making other people’s lives better.

We reinforce them all day long through Strategic Noticing. Here’s how I have been doing this in my own classroom and in schools all over the country for the last couple of decades:

Kid Whisperer: I noticed Kid #7 already has eight of 10 problems done. I noticed Kid #12 and Kid #15 are working together and being collaborative. I noticed Kid #24 is seated. I noticed Kid #25 has the correct soft talking voice level!

And here’s a tremendous side benefit of the Strengths Model of Behavioral Leadership: We become what we focus on. Besides constantly making behaviors better all day instead of making them at least slightly worse all day, the use of Strategic Noticing will actually make the user become more positive instead of more negative.

So, yes, the more you use Strategic Noticing, the better behaviors will be, and the better you will feel about choosing the teaching profession!

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